Critiques and Opinions Welcome

[vanblah]

It's my first time so please don't hold back.

I've never been one to need validation so I have resisted putting my personal songs up for critique. However, I am interested in getting a wider range of opinions and critiques than my local friends and neighbors. Although, I do value those quite a bit since they actually KNOW the band and what we are about.

That said, I am interested in getting your critiques of these three songs concerning any aspect you wish to critique, the mix, the songwriting, etc.

I don't know why I chose these three songs in particular, they sort of represent the lusher side of what we do. I'd love to get a real critique of the entire album, but I don't think I'll be posting the entire thing.

If you want any technical details on these songs I'd be happy to provide any information I can.

One caveat: on the first song, Devastortion, I have included the intro since it sort of sets the feel. It's only 30 or so seconds of your life that you won't get back. :)

Thanks in advance for your opinions and critiques.

Doug

http://www.chessclubrocks.com/mp3/ChessClub_Devastortion.mp3

http://www.chessclubrocks.com/mp3/ChessClub_BoyonaBicycle.mp3

http://www.chessclubrocks.com/mp3/ChessClub_LecheMarron.mp3

[Scratchy Potts]

Ok first I think ..vastortion sounds cool
would like to hear a more aggresive vocal performance
im listening on realy shit headphones so cant coment on
the mix,it sounds good to me

On a bike ...snare sounds boxy but this could be the headphones
they realy are shit ...nice to see ya trying something differant
dont care for the synth bass,but thats just my opinion it counts for nuffin

echeMarron I prefer the vocal on this to the other tracks
yea I prefer this song,as i say I can`t coment on the mix
but on the whole I like it......:Thumbsup:

[dwoz]

The first tune...the intro transition organ should grow out of the church/funeral parlor organ more noticeably. instead it just sort of appears.

The mix is certainly "good".

but it has no glue.



glue.



need glue.



glue is like the bed, the ground.



there's no sense of a ground.



in painting, the ground is the canvas, the base. It isn't 'zero'...there's something there, its a bed.


I don't have any arrangement issue, no instrumentation issue, no tone issue, no balance issue....







just glue.




yo, you still a keyboard mofo, you bastard.



dwoz

(van was on keys for Team Synergy on CaPE IV...and he is a SERIOUS player.)

...of course, disclaimers apply.

[dwoz]

the oboes are blaring from the blaupunkts.....


check the switch to half-time...it needs to be crisper.



maybe a bigger drum fill back into straight time.



The singer is good, but I think he needs to be treated more "intimately".


Check the compression/closeness of something like sarah McLaghlan's closer stuff, like "angel" or something like that...I think that vox treatment would work in the verses. Right in tight at about 2 inches, with some big room in back of you.


again, I have no quarrel with arrangement, parts, tuning, anything....


GLUE GLUE GLUE!!!!!


Ok, think of this:


A mix can be summed up as the "moment of focus/thread of focus". Do you have a "moment" at every instant of the tune? do those moments create a "thread"?


great tune, I love it.


musicianship is unimpeachable.

dwoz

[dwoz]

LecheMarron....

I'm thinking that the busy, busy, busy verse instrumentation would work fabulously if each bandmember would pull it back.

In the mix after the fact, you should think about frequency carving to pull it back and make it more subtle.

the big bgvox chorus deserves to be pushed to much higher peaks.

the distorting guitars in the chorus are not gelling in the mix, the're good, but they have to be tied in better.

somehow.


dwoz

again, impeccable playing. great.

[Drummerboy]

Just listening to the first tune. I won't make a comment about mixing, just don't have the experience yet to do so. But man, I love the tune! :Thumbsup:

dwoz, can you go a little more into what you mean by "glue"? I sorta think I hear what you mean, but I'd have no idea how to achieve it.

Great tune. Greatness is spreading all over the place, so to speak.

[dnafe]

I have asked this question about "glue" upstairs at the Recording/Mixing/Production Forum.

Hopefully we can explore this concept a little deeper.

DOn

[Aardvark]

I have asked this question about "glue" upstairs at the Recording/Mixing/Production Forum.


Glue is rue.


Glue is the distance between the furthest elements made to seem shorter without the listener knowing it.


Glue is a silk web girdle that takes a comfortable inch or two off that belly.


Glue is knowing to never loose track of the guy in the red shirt.


Glue is recognising the red shirt when you see it with your ears.




Cheers,
Aardvark

[Mixerman]

Devastortion
BoyonaBicycle (This is the way)
LevheMarron

There are so many positive things going on in these productions and songs that it's difficult for me to give you concrete ideas or concepts to improve them. The thing about these productions as they stand is, there seems to be a strong vision. This feels like a one man show to me.

Is that good or bad? I don't know. Probably a bit of both.

I think you're a great singer and songwriter. That's half the battle right there.

Frankly, the large majority of suggestions I have, would require a face-to-face. I'll give you one example of why:

"On a Bicycle"

There is something bothering me about the guitar in the verse of this song. If I was working with you or your band, we might try playing those on the upbeats. We might play them as reggae upbeats. I would try turning them way down. I would try changing the timber of that guitar.

In the chorus, I find the guitar too predictable. I love the sound of it, and the idea of it, but to me it should be a little more freeflowing and crazy. Not so regimented on following the precise timings on the changes. I'd take the craziness factor pretty far in a session.

Then there are the transitions. There are none. Sometimes that's okay, but in this case, since you're going from a very straight beat to a swing beat, I think it needs one. Like the drummer doing a swing fill on the last measure of the verse into the chorus. You might even be able to solve that problem with an overdub.

Lastly, the name of the song isn't "On a Bicycle" it's "This is the Way" because 9 out of 10 people are going to walk away singing that line for the rest off the day.

Then there are the questions. The rap section. Is that someone else? I'm confused by this section. I'm not saying I don't like it. But we go from a straight white-sounding singer to a hood accent and lingo. Where did that guy come from? And this isn't to say you couldn't convince me that I'm wrong here. I'd have to understand it, to make a suggestion of how to prevent others from feeling the same thing.

You've done a good job here. I like the recordings. The mixes are unpolished and unprofessional, but they're kind of fresh. The mixes sound like they were done by a well rounded musician, and despite some very apparent flaws (that should be fixed), I like them. I think you're certainly at a stage that a professional, that understands and respects YOUR vision, could help bring these up a notch. But if they don't understand your vision and respect the inherent rawness in this presentation, they'll probably ruin it.

EDIT: BTW, I absolutely adore the last song.

Enjoy,

Mixerman

[nobby]

I like 1 and 3.

#2 is about a minute and a half to long. I found myself looking at my watch and rolling my eyes. :Yawn:

Maybe cut your (Snoop Doggy) dog loose.

Also, maybe you're trying to sound like Hip Hop, but if that guitar chord thing in the beginning and the piano arpeggios aren't loops they may as well be. Monotonous. Annoying.

I'm not of your prime demographic so the negatives I percieve may not have a negative effect on your career. But you music has definite crossover potential (to those of us no longer in our 20s) :grin:

[Aardvark]

I seem to be getting calls and pm's regarding the exceptional quality of the music you have posted...and with good reason.

I have no critique to offer, just a general and hearty 'great work!'

If you have more of these gems please do post them.



Cheers,
Aardvark
:Thumbsup: :icon_eek: :Coolio:

[Calvin]

Doug:

Just echoing what's been said above. I particularly dig the third tune, but that's not to take anything away from the others. :Thumbsup:

[vanblah]

I want to thank everyone who took time to listen to these songs. This information has been excellent. I will say that these songs continue to evolve despite the fact that they have been encoded as 1s and 0s. Your comments and critiques will hopefully help them along the evolutionary trail.

It's funny that music isn't as set in stone as the other popular arts. We record it and then play it again the next day and it's different than it was. Or maybe that's just the beer talking.

[malice]

You are definitly not far. Recordings sound cool. Song are real good.

Some strange things in your mixes. Like some gtr not loud enough, drums or vocal disapearing in some sections.

But I am not sure it is not a part of what I like in the overall production.

malice

[Unfcknblvbl]

If you have more of these gems please do post them.


:Thumbsup: