Overshopped

[MacGregor]

Okay, I can't hear the word Christmas anymore.

Today I was in the mall with my significant other (notice the
avoidance of the word 'better half') for 7 hours.

Seems as if half the population of the western hemisphere has
chosen this seven hours in exactly this mall to do all their
Christmess shopping.
I've listened to all variations of 'Jingle bells' mankind ever
produced, included, but not limited by, Grand Piano played by a
monk, Strings slightly out of tune, String orchestra with
interesting, but not always compelling, tempo variations,
trumpets and other brass who wanted to break down the walls
of jericho and choirs I completely fail to find words words to
describe them.
Not to mention the various manifestations of the latest Jingle
Bells polyphonic ringtones.

I can't stand it anymore.
I'm done.

Anyone out there who want to collab for THE anti-christmas song?

I'm dreaming of a black christmas
With crosses hanging upside down
Where the trees are burning... etc. pp.

[dwoz]

Its beginning to look a lot like Rapture
Ev'rywhere you go;
With more of us serving five-and-ten, glistening once again
With candy soap and astroglide aglow.

It's beginning to look a lot like Rapture,
BoyZ in ev'ry store,
But the prettiest sight to see is the 'Bruce' that will be
Knockin' On your own front door.

A pair of hopalong boots and a farm animal that doesn't have a movie deal
Is the wish of Barney and Ben;
Dolls that will talk and will go for a walk (on the wild side)
Is the hope of Janice and Jen;
And Mom and Dad can hardly wait for school to start again.

It's beginning to look a lot like Rapture
Ev'rywhere you go;
There's a DOA in the Grand Hotel, one in the park as well,
The sturdy kind that doesn't mind the snow.

It's beginning to look a lot like Rapture;
Soon the bells will start,
And the thing that will make them ring is the money and the bling
and the bullet within your heart.

[chrisj]

Here ya go- from those of us who remember Tom Lehrer :D

"Christmas time is here, by golly,
Disapproval would be folly.
Deck the halls with hunks of holly,
Fill the cup and don’t say when.

Kill the turkeys, ducks and chickens,
Mix the punch, drag out the Dickens.
Even though the prospect sickens,
Brother, here we go again.

On Christmas Day you can’t get sore,
Your fellow man you must adore.
There’s time to rob him all the more
The other three hundred and sixty-four.

Relations, sparing no expense, ‘ll
Send some useless old utensil,
Or a matching pen and pencil.
(”Just the thing I need, how nice!”)

It doesn’t matter how sincere it is,
Nor how heart felt the spirit,
Sentiment will not endear it,
What’s important is the price.

Hark, the Herald Tribune sings,
Advertising wondrous things.
God rest ye merry merchants,
May ye make the Yuletide pay.
Angels we have heard on high,
Tell us to go out and buy!

So, let the raucous sleigh bells jingle,
Hail our dear old friend Kris Kringle,
Driving his reindeer across the sky.
Don’t stand underneath when they fly by."

God bless us, EVERY one :D

[Grapestomper]

Here ya go- from those of us who remember Tom Lehrer :D


Tom Leher rules!

Anybody who can rhyme the periodic table is in their own category.

I took a math class from him at UCSC years badk. I'd already covered the material years before, and it was a really easy intro-level course, but...

I took it anyway just to sit and listen.

Fun and funny guy!
M

[nobby]

Anyone out there who want to collab for THE anti-christmas song?



There's one in the works in the C&C. (http://womb.mixerman.net/showthread.php?t=550)

[MacGregor]

There's one in the works in the C&C. (http://womb.mixerman.net/showthread.php?t=550)

After pouring a good old Scottish single malt and reading your
lyrics I feel better now.
Don't like that there's a happy end, though :Twisted:

[Johnny]

Contrary to death-metal custom, the upside-down cross is the symbol of St. Peter.


One problem I've run into is that there are only so many Christmas songs that don't mention Jesus. So in the malls you get 9000 versions of "Jingle Bells," "White Christmas," "Silver Bells," etc. It's maddening.

[Starfucker]

Your problem isn't christmas...


Your problem is Christmas shopping. And your solution is BUY NOTHING DAY and BUY NOTHING CHRISTMAS


it was last month... but does your wife know that?

http://adbusters.org/metas/eco/bnd/bnxmas/index.php